Daylight Nightmares

Sitting in the water
bobbing up, then down
waiting for the other shoe
or leg, to drop
using my limbs
for bait, it feels.

Just a month ago
something
pulled me from my board
something
that will remain nameless
some thing.

It's taken this time
to get past the hesitation
the short breaths
the constant anxiety
to a state of mostly calm
interrupted by great visions of white.

So I sit, trying not to
but gazing into the depth anyway
a fingered leaf here, a branch of kelp there
knowing I won't see
what I need to see
until it's



upon me.